nyehs:

i literally just thought to myself “wow halloween is almost over” but then i remembered that the entire month of october isnt halloween and halloween is actually only one day and hasnt even started yet



So my professor was asking questions.
  • Professor: Who plans on getting married within the next 5-10 years?
  • Like 3 people: *raises hand*
  • Professor: Who plans on never getting married?
  • Me: *raises hand*
  • Professor: *points me out* why?
  • Me: It's illegal.
  • Professor: touche.



cumberbear:

gethinblake:

everyone please realise that benedict and martin are in all likelihood actually not remotely bothered by the word soccer lol it’s like very very common in southern england to intentionally ham up the whole hoity toity anglocentric thing for comedic effect

Yep it’s a typical Brit thing to be a sarcastic little shit and take the piss out of things whilst taking the piss out of ourselves at the same time. They honestly mean nothing by it. 


what, you studied for prison?




the-real-mozart:

devongreen:

dashdrive:

this oatmeal has god damn dinosaur eggs in it and then when you cook it THE DINOSAURS FUCKIN HATCH IM SO PUMPED

Was this post made in 1996?

fun has no expiration date


his-winter-children:

anothersummersrhyme:

Sebastian Stan working out at the gyn.

hail


muchymozzarella:

tapdancers:

Keeping The Same Tabs Open For 9 Days Straight Because They Contain Information Relevant To Tasks You’re Too Lazy To Complete - A novel by me

image

yup



darkbluetile:

thebrownskingirl:

You are so used to your features, you don’t know how beautiful you look to a stranger.

I can’t believe I’m even more beautiful than I think I am this is incredible where’s my modeling contract